L'amour des deux lapins: Dans déguisement
by Polly Lynn
Summary: Summary: "He's planned it all out. He's been watching the two of them—taking notes and everything—and he's settled on the best possible time. It's going to work. It's going to be so cute. " A Halloween three-shot in the bunneh-verse. NOW COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

Title: L'amour des deux lapins: Dans déguisement

Rating: T

WC: 1300

Summary: "He's planned it all out. He's been watching the two of them—taking notes and everything—and he's settled on the best possible time. It's going to work. It's going to be _so _cute. " A Halloween two-shot in the bunneh-verse.

A/N: Cora Clavia bombards me with pictures of bunnehs. I'm sure she never dreamed anything like this would happen. Never.

Second chapter will be up tomorrow.

* * *

He has a plan, and it's totally going to work.

He's being quiet about it. Not because it's not going to work. It's _totally _going to work. But he wants it to be a surprise. Plus, Kate will tell him not to do it. She'll tell him he's asking for trouble.

But he's not. He's planned it all out. He's been watching the two of them—taking notes and everything—and he's settled on the best possible time. It's going to work. It's going to be _so _cute.

They've just eaten. Ferrous is a somnolent lump burrowed as deep as he can get down into one of the oversized throw pillows that used to belong on the couch. It lives on the floor under the gas fire now. Because it's fall, and they don't like to be cold. Batman _really_ doesn't like to be cold, and even Kate's given up on trying to reclaim the pillow, though she picked it up and put it back on the couch ten times a day for weeks.

She still grumbles about it every once in a while, but she's pretty much given up on the whole _people things _and _rabbit things _nonsense. It's about time. There was never much hope of holding out. They're adorable every time they steal something new. The way Ferrous sits on whatever it is and blinks up at them, happy and proud. The way Batman dares them to try to take it back. Dares _him_, anyway. With Kate, she backs down sometimes. _Sometimes_.

But the pillow is a rabbit thing now, and Kate knows it as well as he does. He bought a few new ones for the couch—people things—and she hasn't said a word, so he knows she's given up. How could she not? They're so _cute _like this. The way Ferrous snores and Batman nestles up against his side. The way the firelight catches the subtle colors in both their coats.

It's the perfect time to do this. They've both just eaten. Ferrous diving in head first as usual, and Batman tossing the entire contents of her bowl in the air, then hopping around to delicately retrieve every last bit. It's the best possible time.

She's watchful. Batman is always watchful, but this is as close to content as she gets. Still and unexcitable. Relatively unexcitable, just like this every day.

Castle slips the elastic around his wrist and pushes the stiff, bright orange netting as far up his forearm as it will go. He thinks about pulling his sleeve down. Maybe it's a good idea to keep it out of sight until the last second. Maybe he should let her think this is just an early evening cuddle while they wait for Kate.

Or maybe he should let her get used to it. Batman is _not _a fan of surprises. He knows it's going to work, but there's no sense tempting fate.

He hears Kate moving around upstairs. He's running out of time and that decides him. He leaves it where it is, a bright flare of color just below the pushed-up sleeve of his sweatshirt.

He drops to the floor and stretches out on his side along the pillow. Batman startles and gives him a sharp look. Ferrous snorts and stirs. Batman decides that's a more urgent issue. The big rabbit _jostled _her. It can't go unanswered.

She whirls on tiny black paws and twists. Her back feet lash out to thump the Ferrous's solid flank, once,twice_. _Ferrous gives another snort and opens his eyes with a decidedly grumpy blink. He's half asleep. It's the only time he comes close to standing up to her, even though he's five times her size.

He twitches all over now. He's full and sleepy and bold with it all. His head curves back. He pokes at her tiny body with his nose. Batman darts a paw out to slap him, but he opens his jaws and nips, just barely catching one of the little rabbit's nails with a firm _click._

"_Dude,__" _Castle breathes. "Not sure I would've done that."

Batman isn't sure either. She chatters angrily and kicks out with her hind feet again, graceless for once in her fury. But the big rabbit just smiles at her. He gathers himself up and lumbers from side to side. He sighs and settles again, closing his eyes before she's even done kicking.

Batman clacks her teeth at him once more, but she settles, too. More quickly than Castle would have thought and he's more convinced than ever. It's the perfect time. It's totally going to work.

The little rabbit jerks her head up toward Castle with a cross, expectant look.

"Oh, may I pet you now?" He props himself on one elbow and reaches his hand out toward her. Batman headbutts his knuckles in answer.

"Oh, _thank you,_ your majesty." He drags two fingertips between her ears, just the way she likes it.

She sits up stiffly at first. She's miffed and wants both of them—Castle _and_ Ferrous—to know who's boss.

"Like there's any doubt about that," he mutters.

He keeps his fingers moving. Slow, steady, and methodical. He's learned the hard way not to deviate from the petting protocol too much. The tulle slips down his arm a little. It brushes at the little rabbit's tail. She swings her head from side to side trying to get a look at it.

Castle stiffens, bracing for violence, but she's full and sleepy, too, and he really has this down to a science. She clicks her teeth a few times and kneads the pillow, but it's a half-hearted effort at best. Not quite her usual thump and angry chatter. She's staring into the distance before too long, irritation forgotten.

He stirs his fingertips in circles over the top of her head, working his way forward to scratch just in front of each ear. She bunches and stretches, pressing closer to his fingers, then burrows her nose deeper into Ferrous's side.

She's almost out, but not quite asleep. This is it. The perfect time.

Castle moves carefully. He's totally being clever. He strokes his fingers back and forward again. He makes his way further and further along her spine, dragging two fingers, then three down her side, always returning to bring his nails to bear at the base of each ear.

He waits for her breathing to settle into a rhythm. For her tiny ribs to meet his fingers and fall away. The elastic works its way down his forearm as it drags against the bulk of Ferrous's flank. It finally lands right around his wrist just as Batman's eyes close and open in a heavy blink. It's perfect. It's time.

He rolls on to his belly and slips a hand under the flat of her back feet in one smooth motion. He lifts her a fraction of an inch and from the pillow and snags the fabric with his pinky. It catches her weight. Her backside hangs from it briefly and he tugs. Up and over her paws it goes. One more tug, and it's in place. It settles perfectly, right around her waist. Or where her waist would be if rabbits had them. Which they kind of don't. He hadn't really thought about that.

She turns on him. She's on alert in half an instant. She leaps and twists in the air and comes down once. The firelight flickers over her tiny form, beautiful and black with a puff of orange tutu around her waist. It's adorable. She's completely _adorable. _

He's just about to call out for Kate. She needs to see this. And he needs a picture. The whole world needs to see this. She's so freaking _cute._

He turns toward the stairs to call out. He digs in his pocket for his phone. He lets his attention wander for less than a second.

That's when the bloodshed starts.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: L'amour des deux lapins: Dans déguisement

Rating: T

WC: 1400 this chapter, ~2700 total (so far)

Summary: "He's planned it all out. He's been watching the two of them—taking notes and everything—and he's settled on the best possible time. It's going to work. It's going to be so cute. " A Halloween three-shot in the bunneh-verse.

A/N: Um. Shhhh. It's three chapters. Working hard to have the third up before midnight.

I'm soooo sorry. I suck. Oh, also? I know my French is wrong. It's at least slightly wrong in all the titles. This is an Artistic Choice.

* * *

It starts with bloodshed and gets worse from there. Although, honestly, the bloodshed goes on for a while. A long while.

It starts with a lunge, of course. Castle sees his life flash before his eyes. The tiny, black body hurls toward him, surrounded for now by a ring of bright orange fire. He somehow gets his palms around the bulk of her before she can really take off, though.

She draws first blood, then. She rears up and the sharp flat of her teeth slices across his knuckle. It stings. It _really _stings, but he's not new at this. He holds on.

"Batman, I'm _trying _to help," he hisses.

She answers in kind. An outraged, chattering string of sound as she dips her head and goes for skin again. Castle manages to dodge this time.

He tosses her from one palm to the other, then turns her in his hands. He tugs at the orange puff, but she's flailing wildly. She's a blur of angry movement, gouging his palm, and he can't see where or how the tutu is catching her. All he knows is it's tangled now. It's dotted with his blood and pinning her back legs, and he swears her little body gets hotter and hotter between his hands—like her tiny bunny fury is manifesting as body heat.

He struggles to his feet. He lifts her close to his chest and backs into the better light of the living room. He holds her up and tries to let her back feet flop free. He needs a better look at this situation around her backside, but one flat paw is well and truly hooked through the fabric. Her nails are caught in the mesh. With every furious thrash, she has less and less freedom of movement.

"I get it," he tells her desperately. "You hate it. You want it off you. _Work _with me here."

Batman growls in answer. It's _loud. _ Castle stares down at her, fascinated and oddly proud. The growl rumbles through her again. It rumbles through what little there is of her, and he can't help but think she shouldn't be able to _make _a sound that loud. But she does. She growls a third time, just to underscore the point.

It wakes Ferrous and things get worse in a hurry.

The big rabbit is on his feet in an instant. His head swings around. He homes in on Batman before his eyes are even really open, and he's on the move. He covers the distance to Castle's feet in two thudding leaps.

He goes into a slide as he comes down the second time. His heavy back end comes around in a slow-motion arc as he scrabbles for purchase on the slippery hardwood surface. His flank slams into Castle's feet hard enough to send him reeling back a step.

Ferrous twists around to face him. He rears back on his haunches. That's when things get _really _bad.

Time slows to a crawl. The big rabbit strains up to look at the two of them. His eyes open wide and fix on Batman. She twists in Castle's hands and chatters down at him. He stills. His eyes go narrow and flick to meet Castle's. It's an awful moment—worse than the sum of all the terrible moments in his life up to then.

Ferrous is shocked. Ferrous is wounded. Ferrous is _pissed. _

"_Shit_."

Castle tries to move. He tries to get his body going again, but it's too late. Ferrous leaps. He hits hard just below Castle's knees. The solid weight rocks him back. He falls, not quite on the couch, but the incline of his body as it slithers to the floor is more than enough for the big rabbit's purposes.

Ferrous digs in. Front paws and back find purchase as he makes his way toward Batman. Castle's skin stings in a hundred places. A massive paw lands in the center of his gut. The breath goes out of him at the exact moment he realizes now might be a great time to call for help.

The big rabbit lowers his head and pushes hard at Castle's elbows. He throws his weight from side to side and forces them apart, wedging his bulk between Batman and Castle's chest.

"I'm sorry," Castle says faintly. He strains back as the big rabbit climbs higher still, but there's nowhere to go. "I'm sorry."

Ferrous slaps him. His chin rocks to the side, straight into the path of a second furious paw. He pauses then. The big rabbit pauses just long enough to fix Castle with a cold look of disappointment before he turns his back. He twists and writhes and Castle's hands fly apart.

He drops Batman. He _drops _her. There's a slow-motion instant of horror as he waits for her to fall to the floor, except she doesn't. Whatever's going on with the tutu, she has the measure of it now. She works with it, her tiny, bunched back end moving as a single, graceful, ridiculous unit.

Her free back paw pushes hard against the heel of his hand. She bounds over Ferrous and hits Castle's shoulder. She pushes off again. She sails up and over. A front paw snakes out at the last second. She hisses and catches him just over the eyebrow. A long, searing furrow. A parting shot.

She falls the short distance to the couch. She chatters and flops around. Her parkour moves have shifted the tutu again, tangling her back paws in a hopeless twist of orange. She can't get purchase on the leather.

She lets out a plaintive sound and Ferrous goes after her. He lands a back paw in the hollow of Castle's throat, doubling him over as he pushes off.

The big rabbit lands with a mighty thump. Batman hits out at him. He bows his head and takes the brunt of a flurry of paws on the top of his head. He waits. He gives her a few seconds to wear herself out. Then he moves.

He touches his nose to hers. The little rabbit clacks her teeth once, but the effect is instant. It calms her. Ferrous dips his head again, offering her the top. She slaps it once and nudges him behind her.

Castle watches in breathless fascination.

Ferrous raises one paw and brings it down, light brown on black, just for an instant. He draws it back and brings it down again, firmer this time. Batman rears up. She tries to, but Ferrous is heavy. Even one paw is heavy. He twists his head to the side. He nips at her flank.

Castle gasps. He tries to gasp, but he's still recovering from the last 10 seconds.

Batman . . . yelps? It's something between her usual chatter and the growl he's only just heard. Ferrous nips again. She springs forward. She bunches her tiny body as small as it will go and pushes hard.

Ferrous pushes back. He lowers his head. Batman darts away, a black streak now. A black streak and nothing more.

Castle's head whips after her then back toward Ferrous. The tutu flares out around his head, an orange blaze like a lion's mane. The big rabbit stares him down.

There's a clattering on the stairs behind him. It's Kate, crossly calling out, demanding to know what all the noise is, then cursing blue streak. Something about Batman.

_Batman. _She's freaked out and roaming around loose. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knows that's not good. It's _really_ not good, but he can't spare a thought for that right now.

Ferrous is staring him down. He can't look away. It's bad. There's something bad here. Worse than the world's cuddliest rabbit looking at him like he wonders how tasty his eyeballs might be.

"Orange." He croaks it out at last. A single word and he doesn't even understand why it's important.

Ferrous shakes his head. The stiff material of the tutu bristles furiously. He opens his jaws and growls once. He rears up on his back paws, turns, and runs.

"Kate!" Castle calls out. Somehow he finds the breath and calls it out. "Orange!"

"Orange," she breathes.

She's at his shoulder suddenly. She's at his shoulder with Batman tucked into her elbow like nothing happened. Like there hasn't been a near-death-by-rabbit experience going on for the last . . . however long this has been going on.

He turns to her. She turns to him. They stare at each other in horror.

"Shit," she says. "Shit, Castle. He's gonna eat that."


	3. Chapter 3

Title: L'amour des deux lapins: Dans déguisement

Rating: T

WC: 3000 this chapter, ~5600 total (for realsies)

Summary: "He's planned it all out. He's been watching the two of them—taking notes and everything—and he's settled on the best possible time. It's going to work. It's going to be so cute. " A Halloween three-shot in the bunneh-verse.

A/N: THERE! I am SORRY that the brisk, 1000-word chapter 2 became two chapters, clocking in at 4300 words, but it is not like I have any control over . . . well, ANYTHING.

Happy Halloween and thank you for continuing to tolerate the bunnehs!

* * *

She takes care of everything. Of course she does.

Castle watches miserably from the floor as she settles Batman in the hutch with a few stern words. The little rabbit chatters grumpily, but you'd never know she had murder on her mind ninety seconds ago. She crowds up to the mesh and watches with interest as Kate goes on her belly after Ferrous.

The big rabbit doesn't get far. He heads right for the arm chair. He always heads for the arm chair. It's his idea of an ideal hiding space, even though the brown swell of his backside sticks most of the way out and catches the glow of the floor lamp.

"Ferrous." She drops to her belly, her voice infinitely soft as her hand creeps under the arm chair.

"Careful!"

It's sharper than he means it to be. Her hand jerks back and her head twitches toward him in surprise. He looks away.

"He's mad," Castle mumbles. "He was really mad."

She nods. He sees the corner of her mouth twitch, but she doesn't laugh. She's nice. She's taking care of everything and being _nice. _It makes everything worse.

"You mad at him, big guy?"

She scratches around the base of Ferrous's tail. His huge hind feet jog up and down, making his rump wiggle happily. She gropes around under the chair until her whole arm is hooked underneath. She backs out carefully, sliding a heap of brown and orange along as she goes.

Ferrous blinks up at her as if the light surprises him. As if he can't believe she found him in what is obviously the best hiding place ever.

He has one paw hooked through the tutu now. He tugs experimentally at the elastic. He dips his nose and tries to bite at the netting, but whole arrangement twists with the movement, pulling the fabric just out of reach.

"No," Kate says sternly. "No, buddy. Not for eating."

She moves to hook her fingers over his head and around the netting, but for once the big rabbit is faster. He jerks back with another growl and darts away. Straight for the arm chair again. Best hiding place ever.

Kate sits back hard on her heels, her spine jerking upright in surprise. She twists toward the couch. "Did he . . . just?"

"Growled," Castle confirms. "Told you he was mad."

Batman chatters in agreement and drums her paws against the mesh front of the hutch. Kate shakes her head and hunkers down again.

"Ferrous." She hauls the big rabbit out with a no-nonsense sweep of her arm this time. She gathers him up, nose to nose. "You cannot eat a tutu. Carrots. Carrots are orange things that rabbits eat."

He flails awkwardly in her arms, then stills at the word. The magic word. His ears perk up to full height, looming and ridiculous above the bright fringe of orange. She reaches out a tentative finger and runs it between the elastic and the brown fluff of his cheeks.

"Carrots?" She says again. Ferrous wriggles happily and settles. He twitches his head from side to side, helping her work it free of the fabric. "Good. Good rabbit."

She struggles to her feet and makes her way to the hutch. Batman nips excitedly at the mesh, then steps back obediently at a low word or two from Kate. She lifts the door and muscles Ferrous inside.

There's a long, chirping flurry of sawdust and movement. They dance around each other. Ferrous bows his head and noses at Batman's side. She nuzzles the top of his head and bats at it with soft, apologetic paws. Kate stays close until they settle.

"Carrots in a minute," she says softly. "Have to tend to the wounded."

Ferrous perks up again at the magic word, but just for a second. Making up with Batman takes precedence. Even over carrots.

Kate sinks down cross-legged on the couch behind him. She leans forward to tip his head back against her shins.

"How bad?" he asks quietly.

"Just a scratch, I think." She probes delicately at the mess of blood and skin over his eye.

"Not me." He twists away from her hands, swiping impatiently at his forehead. His fingers come away bloody. He reaches for the tutu still circling her wrist. "We should call the vet."

"I think the vet went into WitSec about three weeks after you brought them home."

"Funny. Seriously. How much of it did he get?" He threads the netting through his fingers, trying to get a look at the whole thing. There's a tear or two. And bloodstains, of course.

"Not much," Kate murmurs absently. She narrows her eyes and tips Castle's face from side to side. "And he's eaten a fountain pen. And a sock. And Parcheesi pieces. And at least one tampon. I think he's fine."

"But stiff fabric . . . _Ow." _He hisses and tries to duck away.

"Hold still and it won't hurt." She slaps his hand away and flattens a palm against either side of his jaw. "She got you bad here." She lifts his chin high and traces a fingertip just over the burning trail down his throat.

"He did. Ferrous." The name is heavy on his tongue. He tries to duck away again. He gives a miserable twist of his shoulders. Every single scratch comes to agonizing life. His knuckles throb, and she catches him anyway. She dips her head and brushes her lips over his temple.

"Ferrous," she says like she can't quite believe it. "Sorry, Castle."

"Why are you being _nice?" _It's a groan. It's a whine. It's everything she hates, but she just laughs now. She laughs and he lets himself sink back. He turns to peer up at her.

"Aren't you going to yell?" He presses a kiss to her knee.

"Why would I yell, Castle?" She flicks his ear, though, like she knows he needs it.

He does. It makes him smile. It makes things . . . a little less worse. She stirs her fingers through his hair and everything is a little less worse.

"Someone should yell," he says as he settles his shoulders against her. "Seems like a yelling occasion."

"Probably," she agrees. "But what could I _possibly _say that's worse than having Ferrous mad at you?"

* * *

He's patched up. He's all over Batman band-aids. One above his eye and another across his knuckles. One more over his throat, but that's more for the sight gag than anything. Batman band-aids. It's all they have, but it feels right. A strange rabbity version of the scarlet letter. Or something.

The rabbits are out again. She's sitting under the gas fire with them, hand feeding carrots to Ferrous and coaxing Batman through her occasional bouts of fury. He can't tell if it's worse than usual. If she's still traumatized or just . . . Batman.

He lingers a few steps behind Kate, hands hanging at his sides. He's not sure what to do. He's not sure he's welcome, but she tips her head back and rolls her eyes. She reaches for him and tugs at his hand.

"Come on, Castle."

She pulls him down next to her. He skims a grateful kiss over her cheek as he goes. He settles his back against the wall and watches. Ferrous's eyes close in ecstasy as he nibbles a carrot stick down to the surface of her fingertips. He stops just in time.

"Good," she says. "Good bunny." She pops the stubby end of carrot into his waiting mouth and Ferrous rolls his shoulders in deep satisfaction.

She grabs another carrot stick and offers it to Batman. The little black rabbit turns up her nose at first, and Ferrous makes a dive for it.

"Ah ah! No!" Kate taps his head. "Hers."

Batman chatters emphatic agreement. She reaches up and takes the carrot stick in a delicate nip. She shakes her head dramatically, then flings it away. Ferrous gives Kate an unhappy look but stays put as the little rabbit darts after it.

"They're ok?" he asks softly. They are. He can see that they are, but he feels like he should ask.

"They're fine." She lifts Ferrous's chin and tilts the brown head in Castle's direction. "Aren't you fine, Ferrous?"

The rabbit's face goes soft in his goofiest grin. Something lets go inside Castle. The band-aids pull and his skin still burns in a dozen places, but something lets go. He reaches out and skims a palm down the length of the big rabbit's spine. Ferrous arches into him, just like he always does.

"They're fine," she says again with a smile as Batman hops back over to see what's going on. "So what was his?" She scoops the black rabbit into her lap and nods at Ferrous.

"His?" Castle looks up at her in surprise.

"Castle." She gives him a pitying look."I know he has a costume. I know he loves it. And I know you've been putting it on him every single chance you've gotten for weeks."

"It's awsome." His face lights up, then dims immediately. "It _was _awesome. I don't know . . ."

"Show me." She lifts Batman up and tucks the tiny black bulk of her under her own chin. "Show us."

Castle looks down at the big bunny. It's forgotten. The cold look is gone. There's no trace of ferocious anger, not a hint of betrayal in the happy press of fur against his fingers. Of course there isn't. This is the rabbit who thinks the armchair is the best hiding place ever. For Ferrous, it's like it never happened.

But _he_ remembers. Castle remembers.

He hesitates. His fingers pull back and Ferrous stirs. He looks up expectantly and takes a small hop. He follows the warmth and shelter of a broad palm. He marches in place. He huddles his body into a tall heap and presses close. He follows contentment like always.

Castle smiles. "What do you think, buddy? Dashing Ferrous?"

Ferrous springs up at the word. His eyes open wide and he launches himself at Castle. The rabbit's considerable bulk takes him in the stomach again. Scratches make themselves known all up and down his body. Castle lets out an _oof_ for show and scrambles to his knees.

He smacks a kiss against Kate's cheek and whispers the words into Batman's ear. _Dashing Ferrous. _It's possible that one of them rolls her eyes. It's possible they both do.

Castle pours the eager rabbit out of his arms and on to his desk. The doorway darkens and he smiles—he smiles at Kate's hip leaning easy against the book case and the way Batman rests in the crook of her elbow.

He slides open the desk drawer and tells Ferrous _Up_ in a nervous whisper. The rabbit sinks obediently on to his haunches and offers Castle his front paws.

"That's my bunny." Castle grins down and drapes the black velvet across his back. He tugs at the fabric to center the gold-embroidered jolly roger before he fastens the velcro bands, one around the broad brown middle, the other just under the dangling paws.

"Bow," he says, but Ferrous is distracted. He's wriggling happily, trying to get a look at his own backside.

"Dude." Castle taps the rabbit's head firmly. "This is the best part. _Bow." _

Ferrous drops instantly. He lowers his nose to the desk and stills. Castle works the elastic a few times and pulls it wide. He ducks the hat down and around the base of each ear and backs it up. He centers it on the broad brown head and gives it one tug to settle it at rakish angle over one eye.

"Around." Castle pats one haunch and moves a few things aside, making a clear stage. Ferrous turns in an excited circle to face his waiting public.

Kate makes a noise that might have been a _squee _if she were anyone but Kate Beckett and he hadn't already had a rough night. She dashes to the desk and sets Batman down.

"Dashing Ferrous!"

The big rabbit lifts his chin, preening as Batman hops around to nibble at the gold embroidery on his vest and Kate reaches out to trace the skull and cross bones on the tricorn hat.

"Told you." Castle steps around the desk to crowd behind her.

"You did." She tips her head back to kiss him. Her fingers stall, drawing an annoyed clack of teeth from Ferrous. She laughs down at him. "Plenty to go around, you."

"Dashing Ferrous is a little pleased with himself," Castle whispers against his neck.

"Is he now?" She leans back against him, shifting her hips.

Castle groans and tries to tighten his arms around her. She slips away, though. Somehow she scoops Batman from the desk and twists halfway across the room before he has time to blink.

"Hey!" Ferrous backs him up with another clack and a heavy thump against the desk.

"Hey nothing," Kate says with a wicked smile.

Castle sweeps Ferrous into his arms and gives chase, but she closes the bedroom door in his face. "HEY!"

Four sparkling eyes appear in the gap above the books just to the right of the door.

"Two minutes," she says. "No boys allowed."

"Discrimination! What do we think about _that_, Dashing Ferrous?" He turns the rabbit toward him and gets no answer but a solemn blink. "Ok. I guess we wait."

Castle drops into an armchair and settles the big rabbit on to his lap. Ferrous slops back on to his haunches and cocks his head to the side.

It's the longest two minutes ever. He can hear drawers opening and closing and the muffled sound of Kate's words. Just chatter at first, then one or two sharp commands. Then silence. The silence goes on long enough to make him worry.

"Kate?" he calls out and there's no answer.

He's at the point of hauling the two of them from the comfortable depths of the chair when she throws open the door with a flourish.

Batman sits in her outstretched palm. He thinks it's Batman, anyway, but mostly because it's really unlikely that she had time to stash another rabbit in the bedroom. But she's sitting still. Her front paws are straight and her nose is high and she's sitting absolutely still in a very un-Batman-like way.

Ferrous catches sight of her and does a double take. He scrambles in Castle's lap and almost makes a break for it.

"Whoa," Castle breathes as he settles Ferrous against his chest and pushes to his feet. "Whoa!"

It's . . . amazing. A punky red plaid that covers her from the back of her neck to the fluff of her tail. It's cut straight around the shoulders, but it flares out to half a dozen pleats over the bunch of her hindquarters. There's a skull and crossbones patch on either side, just behind her front paws and another where it fastens under her chin.

"Whoa," he says again.

"Hear that, Batman? 'Whoa'!" Kate nudges the little rabbit toward him. He looks down quickly, more than a little nervous, but Kate laughs. "She loves it. Go on."

He hands over Ferrous in an awkward swap and settles Batman along his forearm.

"You are . . . gorgeous_," _ he tells her. She lifts up. She gives him one paw, then the other, and lets him look her over. She turns in a circle at his urging and lets him trace the lines of the little kilt. "Very punk rock."

He looks up at Kate, but she's sharing secrets with Ferrous. Scratching his belly and tugging at his vest. He wriggles happily in her arms, but he's impatient. His head turns this way and that, seeking out Batman.

Castle brings her close. He holds the little black nose up to his. "Your turn buddy?"

Kate nods to the armchairs. "A little them time?"

"Yeah," he grins at her and hurries to shove at the chair with his hip. "Them time. Us time."

"Us time later, Castle." She grins and shoves the other chair toward his. "Enough Acts of Batman for one night."

"Enough," he agrees.

They jostle the chairs together, seat to seat in a make-shift pen. Castle drops pillows in the gaps and sets Batman on one wide cushion. Kate spills Ferrous out on to the other and the two circle each other in a curious, scrabbling flash of fur and fabric. They chase back and forth and side to side. They come to rest facing each other, chattering happily and nosing at one another's costumes.

Castle settles up on to one of the chair backs. He reaches out to snag Kate by the waist. She wriggles into his lap with a little more hip action than is strictly necessary. He growls and ducks his head to nip at her neck.

"How?" he mutters as he works his way up to her ear. "What dark powers did you use to get her into that adorable thing?"

"Later, Castle." She grins and tips her head to the side. "I'll tell you all about my dark powers later."

"A hint?" His fingers find their way under her shirt and over her belly. "I'm wounded."

"Wounded!" She laughs, not quite disguising the hitch in her breath. "Whose fault is that?"

"Mine," he murmurs as his tongue darts out to taste the sudden flutter of her pulse. "Totally mine. I confess."

"Mmmm," she leans back into him. "I love a good confession."

"I know detective." He lets the whisper rumble over her. "Hint. _Hint." _

"Hint." She reaches up behind her to pull his ear to his mouth. "No tutus."

* * *

A/N: If you're interested, I'll link to pics of the costumes that inspired those for my favorite lagomorphs. Please remember to blame Cora Clavia for ALL of this. Also, ask her about Fuss.


End file.
